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Landon Saunders


            To see a lonely person, maybe all you need do is look in the mirror. There it is. Loneliness. You don’t know what to make of it. Or how to handle it. You think it’s the biggest thing standing between you and happiness.

            Why do we automatically think there’s something abnormal about or wrong with loneliness?

            Actually, sometimes it’s the most natural and healthy human response to a situation. Whenever you find yourself separated from someone you love, you may begin to feel lonely. That’s a good sign. Your humanity is telling you something important is missing.

            There are times when everyone feels lonely. It can be a valuable experience—part of the cost of being a unique, compassionate person in the vast sea of humanity.

            If, however, loneliness is becoming a dominant part of your everyday life, it’s time to respond to that. Here are some things to do.

  • It’s time to decide, once and for all, to like yourself. Go to the mirror and make a decision. You may faint a couple of times, but stay at it until you can tell yourself that you like you.
  • It’s time to reach out and touch the world outside. Go places. Take yourself out to dinner! You might find you’re good company!
  • It’s time to laugh more. Loneliness withers at the first sound of joy.
  • Cry when you want to. Laughter can be sincere only when you don’t deny your hurt.
  • Listen more carefully to your loneliness. Loneliness is nature’s way of telling you you’re made for relationship. To begin, consciously determine to spend a certain amount of time every day doing something for someone else—no matter how great or small. Just a few minutes—giving freely.
  • Avoid the three traps of loneliness: don’t press; don’t compromise; don’t retreat.
  • Discover your powerful inner resources. Be silent. Welcome your feelings, thoughts, and impulses. There’s an interesting companion in there wanting to make friends.

            And remember, the real key for overcoming loneliness is not just to find another person. The real key is to become a friend. First to yourself. Others will follow.

COMING FRIDAY: Laughing Your Way Back To Health

[This is an excerpt from, How To Win 7 Out Of 8 Days A Week by Landon Saunders which is out of print and used by permission. In 2024 we will work through the entire book, with posts two or three times a week. – Geoffery Moore, Editor]